i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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