I wish life had little blips of pornography
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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