Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
