worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
