So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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