The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
