She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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