people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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