dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize