all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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