Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Screwed.edu
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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