Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
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