Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
