I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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