I don't usually arrange sex via text message
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize