I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
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