Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
