So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
