I just made out with a guy for $7.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
being pregnant is like rehab
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
