Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
