What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
