There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Go christen that room with your naked body.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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