Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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