She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
