I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
