this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
