Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize