Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
