8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize