I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
