you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
