Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
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