It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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