Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
