New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
