We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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