i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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