R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I have tasted many bathrooms
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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