Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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