ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Randomize
