is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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