the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Even my vagina gasped.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
