his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
