:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
