White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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