I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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