I wanna passion pit in your ass
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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