so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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