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i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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