Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
