So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
